Evangelicia

Alicia's Bible Blog

 

 

Psalm 69:7-8. "For it is for thy sake that I have borne reproach, that shame has covered my face. I have become a stranger to my brethren, an alien to my mother's sons."

 

This is the same Psalm I had yesterday, and that always means that God is trying to tell me something! Yesterday it was "the waters have come up to my neck", and I mentioned that they had been, but that He had pulled me to safety. I am still in that safety zone, things have definitely not gone back to normal. I don't think they ever will - I don't think that what I thought was "normal" was good to God. So I am waiting, with great trust and excitement, to see what He does next!

 

Part of the reason the waters were up to my neck was that I had become a stranger to my family, as the Psalm says today. Most members of my family did not want to speak to me during COVID - they did not call, did not reach out, even as I went through some massively difficult life changes. When I dared to express my views in the most innocuous of ways, I was vilified. So I was completely excluded from my family for almost three years, and the pain and trauma were monstrous.

 

As the Psalm says, this reproach was for God's sake! If it had not been for the messages I had been receiving from Him prior to COVID, I probably would have gone along with the whole narrative. It was only because He prepared me for something big coming that I was fully alert and wary as the propaganda was unleashed. Yet my suspicions, questions, and recognition of the fact we were being lied to are what caused my family to not want to talk to me. The hardest part was that I knew that He was not only preparing me, but also calling me to prophesy, but every time I tried with my family, I was ridiculed, vilified, or simply ignored. So I had to step away from them and try to prophesy elsewhere. And I did, and I became close with the most wonderful people.

 

God provided me with support when I needed it most. Everything that has happened to me has led me to trust Him so completely, to love Him so ardently, that I would not have it any other way. He is everything to me now. He always was, but I didn't realize it until I was cut off from everyone I love and I turned exclusively to Him. He then gave me Mary, St. Joseph, the Saints, and, of course, Himself in the Eucharist, as constant, daily consolation and strength. So I thank Him, for the "grace of immolation." Without it, I would not have this amazing, unquestioning trust and hope in these very turbulent times.