Ezekiel 33:8 "If I say to the wicked, O wicked man, you shall surely die, and you do not speak to warn the wicked to turn from his way, that wicked man shall die in his iniquity, but his blood I will require at your hand."

This is part of God's instruction to Ezekiel as He appoints him a "watchman for the house of Israel." God has instructed Ezekiel that "whenever you hear a word from my mouth, you shall give them warning from me." (Ezekiel 33:7), and warns that if Ezekiel does not do so, if he fails to speak when God tells him to, the blood of those he failed to warn will be on his hands.

This passage from Ezekiel was quoted somewhat frequently during COVID when people were saying difficult things, things the world did not want them to say, or that people did not want to hear. There was a priest, early in COVID, who began a homily by quoting this passage and then went on to warn about the promised mRNA vaccines, while also laying out some of the ways we had been lied to about COVID. That homily contained some things I knew to be true, so I was inclined to listen to the other things this priest said. Shortly after it began "going viral", the priest's bishop apparently told him to stop talking about these things, and he did, but he didn't stop speaking, he just avoided direct references to the specific lies. I would like to link the homily but it has, not surprisingly, been removed from YouTube.

I was a bit chastened by this priest's willingness to speak so frankly. At that time, I had come to be convinced that certain things we weren't allowed to say, like that COVID had come from a lab, were in fact true, and I was struggling to see how anyone could not at least consider that we were being lied to. Further, the vehemence with which things like the lab-leak theory were being opposed was one of the things that alerted me to the fact that this world-changing event was actually a page from the devil's handbook, that something much bigger than even a world-wide "pandemic" was going on. But even being alert to this, I did not know close to everything, and I know that the best of lies contain a kernel, or more, of truth. I did not have the ability to discover and counter all of the lies, so I did not preach like this priest did. I did not go out and find people and tell them my thoughts, nor broadcast my skepticism on social media, although when it came up in conversation, I did express my convictions and my questions, which led to strained relationships, many of which remain unhealed today. I questioned whether I was doing what God wanted me to do, whether I was failing to warn people as strongly as I should.

After hearing this priest, I went back and reread this passage from Ezekiel, and, although I still questioned myself sometimes (and still do), I took a few lessons from it. First, God had not indicated to me that I was to be a watchman, in fact, I felt He was calling me to other things (in fact, those "other things" often became so pressing that I had no time at all for anything else!). Second, He had not "spoken a word from His mouth to me", if He had, I would have been very certain of the truth, since His word is truth. Instead, my thoughts were the results of my own questioning, and my own probing. Lastly, I did not have the sense that God was sending me out to warn people. Rather, I felt He was telling me to lay low, to let the relationships I was losing go, at least for now (thus my "cutting the strings" vision). I was not at all certain what the truth was, I just knew we were being lied to in major ways. How could I properly warn people when I could not discern what was a lie and what was truth?  Thus, I knew God was not speaking those particular truths to me, He wanted me to do other things, and had appointed other watchmen, like this priest.

One lesson I learned from all that happened is the importance of discernment, of truly listening for what God is saying to me individually. God is calling each of us to different things, He has to, there's a lot to do! The world screams at us in an outrageous cacophony at times, but God's voice is quiet and calm. We can only hear Him when we separate ourselves from the world a bit and listen. When I did this, I realized it was not my job to add to the cacophony, as I surely would have since my emotions were high. My mission lay elsewhere, and God had appointed more level-headed watchmen than I would have been.