Matthew 18:21-22. Peter asks Jesus how many times we must forgive someone who has sinned against us, "as many as seven times?" Jesus replies "I do not say to you seven times, but seventy times seven." Jesus then goes on to tell the parable of the servant who had his complete debt forgiven by his master only to then turn around and demand full repayment from a fellow servant indebted to him. When the master heard of this servant's behavior, he had the servant imprisoned until his debt was paid in full.

In the Lord's Prayer we ask God to forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us. This passage is Jesus preaching that same forgiveness. We are to love and forgive others the way that God loves and forgives us. If God's mercy endures forever, and it does, so must ours. It is so very difficult, though, to keep forgiving people who hurt us over and over again, and we do not have to be doormats, allowing ourselves to be abused. So sometimes, I think, this forgiveness is something that we have to do in our hearts while also separating ourselves from the people who are hurting us. The forgiving master, for example, would have been foolish to lend the unpaying servant even more money, and would have been hurting that servant by doing so, he would just be putting the servant in a deeper hole of debt. 

If we forgive others in our hearts, pray for them, and distance ourselves from them, that gives the time and space necessary for them to  see the error of their ways and amend themselves. If they are missing us in our separation from them, that is another thing that might cause them to evaluate their attitudes and behavior. But if we allow them to remain in the same realtionship with us, acting like nothing is wrong, they will continue to "trespass against us," because they do not realize that they are doing anything wrong, and thus their "debt," (not to us, but to God) will increase. They will fall deeper into error and sin.

We don't keep our distance in order to lure others into asking for forgiveness or giving us an apology, we must forgive them "seventy times seven" times," whether they ask us to or not. We must forgive in our hearts. No, those people who keep hurting us do not have to ask us for forgiveness, but they do have to stop asking for loans!